We have had an interesting week here! Aubree left on Monday to stay in Evansdale with Grandma and Grandpa O and her daddy and I have really been missing her...but Brycen doesn't really seem to notice. One time when we asked him where Aubree was, he looked out the window at the car like I had left her in the car or something! I know he has enjoyed being an only child for the week and I have definitely enjoyed the special time we have had and getting to run errands together like old times!
I cannot even run the basic errand with both kids now, since I never know how Brycen will be, or if he will try to run from me and then I am chasing him with Aubree in tow. When he gets into one of his uncontrollable times where he is hitting, kicking, spitting, and pulling hair and I have to carry him screaming back to the car or wherever, there is no way I could do that safely with Aubree along. So, only having Brycen this week allowed me to take him everywhere with me! He went with me to Fareway multiple times which he always enjoys seeing Daddy and helping to push the cart. And he was on his best behavior most of the week and was very good in the store each time!
Mike and I went to our first Autism support group this last Tuesday where we met a few people that also have children on the Autism Spectrum. It was nice talking and sharing with people that are at different stages of raising a child on the spectrum and getting advice on where to go from here. Mike and I have agreed this is something we need to involve ourselves in no matter where we are moved to. I think it is very important that not only do we have family and friends that know us supporting us, but having others out there that may not know us as well, but know our situation even better than we do sometimes! We are grateful to Dr. Grant (who I saw all through my pregnancy with Aubree and who delivered her) as he originally mentioned the support group to me this last summer and to his wife who has been a great support talking to Mike at the store when she is shopping. We are also grateful to Angie, who I may have just met here in Storm Lake, but feel that I can relate to more and more each day as we have children the same age and her 3 yr old girl also has been diagnosed with an ASD, and to Betsy who called us to invite us to our first meeting and made us feel so welcome!
The last several months have been a roller coaster of various emotions, tears, and grieving...but our understanding and acceptance of what God has chosen for us is getting easier each day. We both still have our rough days, but we have learned to lean on each other and talk it out more since we know best what each is going through. Even though we have plenty of friends and family that support us, we know that we couldn't do this without each other and that is the best support we can ever give to ourselves and both Brycen and Aubree as we continue to confront Autism!
"When one door of happiness closes, another opens;
but often we look so long at the closed door that we do not see the one which has opened for us."
Helen Keller
Friday, November 13, 2009
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Autism and Our Family
"Autism"----It's one word that can change the life of a child and family in so many ways. Autism Spectrum Disorders are being diagnosed at a rate of 1 in 68 children currently. If you do not already know someone that has been diagnosed, the statistics say it won't be long before you do.
Our son developed typically until around the time he turned 2 years old. We heard words...we saw him play with other kids...we watched as he played with his toys appropriately...we made eye contact with him...overall we understood his wants and needs. In a matter of a few months, that was all taken away from him. He began lining up toys, lost all of his words and signs except for one word "ball", ignored other kids, could not sleep through the night, lost eye contact and the ability to follow directions, and he had no way of letting us know what he wanted or how he felt. It was heartbreaking to see something happening to our child that we couldn't stop!
Brycen began receiving home therapy 1-2 times per month for about 6 months before we realized it wasn't just developmental delays. We knew it was Autism...we just didn't want to say it outloud to anyone. He was officially diagnosed with Autism (classic form and regressive), as well as Mental Retardation in August 2009 by the University of Iowa Hospitals and Clinics.
We continue to learn as we make our way through this journey with Brycen and we will continue to share this journey with you on this blog! The blog has been a great therapy for us to be able to vent our frustrations and struggles with accepting that we have a child with special needs, while sharing how blessed we are to have a child teach us what life truly means. It has also been a great way to inform others of his progress and changes over the last couple of years.
Thank you for your support of Brycen and our family! We hope you are able to learn something through this blog no matter if you are a parent of a child with special needs or a neurotypical child, a teacher or therapist, a family member, or just someone that is interested in the journey that a family goes on as they learn their child is battling a life-long disorder.
Our son developed typically until around the time he turned 2 years old. We heard words...we saw him play with other kids...we watched as he played with his toys appropriately...we made eye contact with him...overall we understood his wants and needs. In a matter of a few months, that was all taken away from him. He began lining up toys, lost all of his words and signs except for one word "ball", ignored other kids, could not sleep through the night, lost eye contact and the ability to follow directions, and he had no way of letting us know what he wanted or how he felt. It was heartbreaking to see something happening to our child that we couldn't stop!
Brycen began receiving home therapy 1-2 times per month for about 6 months before we realized it wasn't just developmental delays. We knew it was Autism...we just didn't want to say it outloud to anyone. He was officially diagnosed with Autism (classic form and regressive), as well as Mental Retardation in August 2009 by the University of Iowa Hospitals and Clinics.
We continue to learn as we make our way through this journey with Brycen and we will continue to share this journey with you on this blog! The blog has been a great therapy for us to be able to vent our frustrations and struggles with accepting that we have a child with special needs, while sharing how blessed we are to have a child teach us what life truly means. It has also been a great way to inform others of his progress and changes over the last couple of years.
Thank you for your support of Brycen and our family! We hope you are able to learn something through this blog no matter if you are a parent of a child with special needs or a neurotypical child, a teacher or therapist, a family member, or just someone that is interested in the journey that a family goes on as they learn their child is battling a life-long disorder.
I forgot to mention that Dr. Grant and his wife also have a son that is diagnosed with an ASD and Dr. Grant is the one that steered me in the direction of AEA services when he noticed Brycen's lack of speech a few months after Aubree was born.
ReplyDeleteMaybe the nights you guys go to the support group could be like a little date night. Like go to dinner beforehand or out for pie or a walk afterward. Don't forget Mike & Melissa relationship time once in awhile! Your kids need that too!
ReplyDeleteI am so happy that the support group went well. Lori's idea to make it a little date night is an awesome one. :) I have gone to a couple of support groups with my friend whose little guy has ASD. They were wonderful. Everyone was so supportive and they have such great stories to share and we learned alot. I wish Ferida would go to more of them. Her husband is on the road alot and she would like him to be there with her. Some of the stories individuals shared were so precious. I was telling your mom one day that they should go. There were actually quite a few grandparents there as well as parents, day care providers, teachers, friends, etc. Every moment shared with Brycen will bring new challenges to you. Some easy to manage and some difficult. But the love and support that you and Mike have for one another is amazing and God will bless you in whatever comes your way!! :) xo Nancy
ReplyDeleteIt is wonderful how the 2 of you have been able to lean on one another for support. It just shows how much love their is in your family. Brycen and Aubree are so beautiful.
ReplyDeleteSupport groups are great and it is amazing how much they really do help. I am so glad that you were able to find one in your area.
Sending love your way,
The Meier Family