Some kids get it on time just like typical developing children...most do not...and some never will. A huge fear of mine is that we will be changing Brycen's pull-ups when we are old enough to draw on our social security. Yes I said it! We don't know when and if it will really happen...potty training that is. It's another one of those things about Autism the doctors can't tell you. You know, whether he'll ever speak so we can understand him, why he has Autism, and of course will he ever be potty trained. When we completed Brycen's first evaluation through U of I almost 3 years ago, we were told around 6 years old is the average time of potty training for a boy on this end of the spectrum. Some of my friend's children on the spectrum trained at 2 or 3...some have yet to fully train...some can do it independently...some are on a strict potty schedule...some may never fully potty train. Brycen turns 6 in 4 months.
I'm not too fond of having to tell people (especially those who aren't very familiar with ASD's) about Brycen still wearing pull-ups. I don't like fielding the questions and the advice is actually quite laughable at times. It's not just a strong willed child I am dealing with and my lack of parenting skills...but sensory issues, fine motor skills, stimming, minimal attention span, lack of body awareness, lack of social skills (seeing other children go), etc. If it was just strong-willed child, I can guarantee he already would have been trained...hence the fact my daughter is about as strong-willed and sassy as they come and she trained right before turning 3 quite easily with very few accidents in the year since. When she was ready, she did it and it wasn't a parent being trained...she doesn't have to be taken to the bathroom at certain intervals...since day 3 or 4 of accomplishing it, she just knows to go when she needs to go. It's quite awesome and I'm quite proud of her! Those with Autism are an entirely different "group" of children...and the book I have been reading said that doctors agree this is the most difficult group to potty train out of all disabilities that are able to be trained (of course there are some disabilities that make it nearly impossible for control over the bladder or bowels).
With that said, I'm also quite proud of Brycen. He battles things every day that you and I can only imagine. One of those things he is battling right now is potty-training. We are so lucky to have very involved teachers/associates at school that want to see him achieve this. They gave me some fabulous ideas to get past the battle of just getting him in the bathroom. With these tips in my head, I set up an environment of success for him starting Friday. It's going to be a long process with him unlike the week or so people have advised me it took for their children (who aren't on the spectrum by the way)...maybe months or years just to get to the point of day training. I'm not even looking at the fact of night training yet. One step at a time! We accomplished a lot this weekend...starting with Brycen just being willing to go in the bathroom and sit on the toilet.
A year ago, this was nearly impossible without us holding him down and really, who wants to hold their child down more than they already have to for shots, dentist appts, meltdowns, etc?! He then acknowledged the new underwear I bought him and he willingly put a pair on.
No protesting sensory issues with the feeling of something different on his bottom. We used a timer for 5 minutes to sit at a time...no protesting with lack of attention span for he had two special toys bought just for this occasion that would be his "potty toys" only. We had some accidents, we had some successes...we had pee and poop on the floor, we had it in the toilet too. It was GREAT!!!
I never knew looking at and cleaning up pee and poop could be such an exciting time in life, but it is! It's a joyful journey I look forward to continuing with Brycen as he shows us he CAN do it!
P.S. He woke up with a dry pull-up this morning and pottied before going to school!!
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