"When one door of happiness closes, another opens;
but often we look so long at the closed door that we do not see the one which has opened for us."
Helen Keller

Monday, April 2, 2012

The Difference Between Awareness and Celebrating

The last 24 hours of Autism Awareness has been exhilarating!  From seeing all of the beautiful pictures posted by friends of their houses bathed in a blue light bulb to the picture of my friend Ilse's accomplishment of having an entire MOUNTAIN lit in blue in South Africa where she lives.  It's amazing just how much support there really is in this world...which is good because Autism is not going away.  With the statistics just released this week of 1 in 88 people now being diagnosed (1 in 54 are boys), those numbers are not in anyone's favor.  It's reality to say that if you do not already have a family member with Autism now, fairly soon you will.  It's not a great statistic.  But when we look past that statistic, it is what it is and my son is one of those 54.  Though he is a face of Autism, it does NOT define him and what he can do in life.

I thought it might be a good time to talk about the difference between awareness and celebrating when it comes to Autism.  Autism is not something we chose for our son...nor would we ever wish Autism on anyone.  No doctor can tell me if my son will ever talk again like he had started to before regression at age 2.  No doctor can tell me if there are any specific treatments that are beneficial for my son without me just trying them.  No doctor can tell me if my child will be able to understand the possibility of going to college, if he will ever live on his own, or if he will get married and have children.  The only thing we do know at this point is that there are no guarantees when it comes to Autism.  It's all a guess right now and that is why we rely on research to try to give us any and all answers.

April is Autism "Awareness" month...not Autism "Celebration" month.  I want everyone to know that I do not and will not celebrate Autism and what it has stolen from my son.  If you do choose to celebrate your child's autism, that is fine with me...I will not judge your choice because we all have different philosophies and beliefs in life. My belief is that my son would have more opportunities to participate in life if he did not have Autism.  This does not mean I don't love my son for who he is.  He has the most contagious smile and giggle...he has a heart that is big enough to love anyone who will attempt to get to know him...he is determined to learn things...he is smart and proud of what he accomplishes.  None of these things have anything to do with Autism...they only describe Brycen! 

I do choose to celebrate anything my child achieves just like all parents should with their children whether they are neurotypical or have a disability.  It's just that sometimes our celebrations for certain milestones come long after many others his age have achieved them...and since doctors can't even tell me if he will achieve some of these, it just makes the celebration so much bigger.  So I am not celebrating Autism...but I am celebrating my son's achievements in life!  Since I will talk a lot about Autism this month, it's because I want everyone to be aware of what Autism is and how it can affect a typical American family.  I want parents in the future to spot the signs earlier than we did and I want them to realize that having a child with Autism is not a "death sentence" for your life or marriage.  It just means you will face obstacles that many other parents will not in this world, but that is what will make this journey of life sweeter than anything else. 

So please join me in providing awareness this month...not celebration!  There is a big difference!
Posted by at
Labels:

No comments:

Post a Comment

Subscribe to: Post Comments (Atom)

Autism and Our Family

"Autism"----It's one word that can change the life of a child and family in so many ways. Autism Spectrum Disorders are being diagnosed at a rate of 1 in 68 children currently. If you do not already know someone that has been diagnosed, the statistics say it won't be long before you do.

Our son developed typically until around the time he turned 2 years old. We heard words...we saw him play with other kids...we watched as he played with his toys appropriately...we made eye contact with him...overall we understood his wants and needs. In a matter of a few months, that was all taken away from him. He began lining up toys, lost all of his words and signs except for one word "ball", ignored other kids, could not sleep through the night, lost eye contact and the ability to follow directions, and he had no way of letting us know what he wanted or how he felt. It was heartbreaking to see something happening to our child that we couldn't stop!

Brycen began receiving home therapy 1-2 times per month for about 6 months before we realized it wasn't just developmental delays. We knew it was Autism...we just didn't want to say it outloud to anyone. He was officially diagnosed with Autism (classic form and regressive), as well as Mental Retardation in August 2009 by the University of Iowa Hospitals and Clinics.

We continue to learn as we make our way through this journey with Brycen and we will continue to share this journey with you on this blog! The blog has been a great therapy for us to be able to vent our frustrations and struggles with accepting that we have a child with special needs, while sharing how blessed we are to have a child teach us what life truly means. It has also been a great way to inform others of his progress and changes over the last couple of years.

Thank you for your support of Brycen and our family! We hope you are able to learn something through this blog no matter if you are a parent of a child with special needs or a neurotypical child, a teacher or therapist, a family member, or just someone that is interested in the journey that a family goes on as they learn their child is battling a life-long disorder.