Despite the obvious challenges, we are hoping that Brycen and Aubree will have a very close relationship as they grow up. Right now, we are still battling the aggression Brycen takes out on Aubree...and Aubree so desperately just wants to play with him!
Aubree has reached the developmental level where she is always pretending...to cook, to change her baby's diaper, to read to us, etc. Brycen never really reached this stage before regression set in. We do find him every once in awhile picking up a play phone and jabbering on it and the school has also told us he will do this during free play. We have tried to teach him to play with pretend food by having Aubree give him a cup and we show him to take a drink, but all he wants to do is throw the cup. While we have accomplished him imitating various actions in other ways, we have not made any progress in the "pretend play."
Brycen uses his aggression to communicate as we know. Since he can't say or motion to get away from him, he will just push Aubree or headbutt her over and over until we intervene and tell her she needs to play with something else. For example, we went to the library and checked out 4 train books for him. Aubree of course likes trains too because she wants to participate in anything she can with her brother. All Aubree wanted to do this morning is sit beside him and look at the book while he flipped through the pages. He then reacts to her closeness by pushing her away. Despite saying over and over to him that Aubree just wants to look, not touch, he has an automatic reaction to do this. Now I don't want everybody to think that Aubree is this little princess that is always nice to him, because she knows how to bother him just like any sibling does. She frequently does take toys from him and then runs, which requires him to chase her and then knocks her down to get the toy back. To Aubree, she thinks it is a game...to Brycen, she is taking his toy away and he just wants it back.
As I type right now, they are playing their newest "game." Aubree has become quite fascinated with girly things like play jewelry she received last year for Christmas from her aunt & uncle, and the dress up shoes that her cousins, Emma & Samantha, gave her. Mike might not like me to share this, but Brycen also enjoys these items. They will bring pairs of the shoes over to me for me to put on their feet and parade around the house while putting on bracelets and necklaces. I know this REALLY doesn't bother Mike like it might some other fathers of their little boys because we are just so happy they are playing "together" and both are happy. Aubree is getting the attention she wants from Brycen, and Brycen is getting probably some sensory input from walking around in the heeled dress-up shoes and is also walking around in the same pattern around the house which is part of his routine and OCD behavior.
Now, we have noticed Aubree has transitioned to the older sibling role recently. I have shared where she will tell Brycen it's time to eat and to sit down while watching a video. She now has expressed herself by telling him "no" when he bangs his silverware on the table just like we do, or to "share" when he won't let her near a toy of his. She will also say "No push, Bryce" when he pushes her and "be nice" when he hits her. I am so glad that she is standing up for herself and it's obvious she is imitating the exact phrases we say to him during these times. It's just very wierd to see your 2 yr old start to "parent" your 4 yr old when it should really be the opposite. Aubree has already shown such a great personality for caring. No matter how many times she is hit, pushed, kicked, or headbutted...she has always forgiven her brother and she will frequently say "I lus Bryce" which means "I love Brycen." She wants to hug and kiss him all the time and I hope this part of her never changes because she is also in for a roller coaster ride these coming years.
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